Bunkum !

In 1773, one year before his death, the great Irish-Anglo poet, author, lyricist Oliver Goldsmith wrote this; 'there is so much bunkum uttered about wine.' Oliver is a man I would like to have met, for I concur, as 251 years later the bunkum has not diminished.

Yes, readers; I'm on my soapbox again, as a result of having recently browsed through the world's most circulated wine magazine.

Consider the following reviews, then respond with your feelings, please.

This, a California Cabernet Sauvignon:

Dense, dark and WINEY, with a core of well-steeped black currant and mulberry fruit well-encased in a range of CAST IRON, roasted alder and bay leaf notes.

Then this, my favourite:

A dense and WINEY style, with a muscular feel to the mix of blackberry, black currant and fig COMPOTE flavours. Features a tug of loam, a flash of espresso crema and plenty of licorice through the finish.

Spare me! No mention of Cabernet Sauvignon varietal character.

Now a Chardonnay, also from California:

Wonderfully lively, this white has terrific energy to the core of LEMON CURD, limeade, YUZU and Honeycrisp apple.

Those descriptives I have typed in major case are those I have most difficulty in understanding.

What have I missed, readers? Somebody, anybody, please enlighten me.

Until next time, imbibe well.